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The Choice Making Process
Making selections is never easy and the worst thing is we are by no means taught the way to make decisions. Nobody taught us this life skill as we are rising up. Nobody in school or at dwelling taught us. We only be taught through observation. And more often than not we observe people not knowing methods to make a call!
And one of the vital ineffective processes is in the making of a pros and cons list! And this is likely one of the most popular ways in which people base their choices on.
So the commonest query I get from my students and shoppers is this: Do I make my resolution based mostly on logic or based on what my heart tells me? Ah, this is where we trip ourselves up BIG TIME. We regularly see logic and our feelings as two separate entities, because we've not experienced them sufficient to be one unit. And we have now not understood ourselves sufficient to know that they're interconnected.
Now let's play devil's advocate here: what is logic? The definition of logic is appropriate reasoning. But appropriate reasoning just isn't the ultimate truth. Our reasoning is based on info we've got in the meanwhile, and so logic expands or contracts depending on available data/information. This additionally implies that logic can change or evolve as we evolve. When we talk about logic, we seem to have a fixed concept that logic doesn't change. But when we talk about feelings/emotions, now we have no qualms about accepting that sure, our emotions/emotions do change depending on situations/circumstances.
If both logic and our emotions do evolve/remodel, this implies that our decision-making process is actually a lot easier than we think. Why? We have now a higher tolerance for things to vary, and that even when we make a choice now based on what we know, that call has room to evolve as well because we're open to the idea that we will have more info over time.
Ultimately, this means that we are able to only make decisions based mostly on the present moment. I know this sounds kinda zen. However this is the only way we are able to move. We can not live our lives stuck up to now based on previous info, neither can we wait in anticipation of what's to come, and be in paralysis, not knowing the way to make the decision. So we can only make choices primarily based on the present moment. Does this make sense to you?
The problem with us people is that we're so filled with fears that confront us in our aware and unconscious that it is almost not possible for most individuals to make decisions based mostly on the present moment. Most people can not live like this. They want guarantees in life, they need ensures in success, they fear to be in pain, to be hurt. And they just need to management everything taking place of their lives, which we know's impossible.
Attempting to control everything and wanting ensures shouldn't be living, and it comes from an especially egocentric perspective that you simply really think you could have any form of management in any way, which stems from a narcissistic egomaniac mind! Are you able to imagine that the majority of humanity operating this way?
In the long run, what occurs is that individuals start making selections based on their fears. "Never trust your fears, they don't know your strengths" this is such an awesome quote! Our fears are quick-sighted and usually don't have any depth in perspective, and making our selections based on fears limits us, and prevents us from seeing more and further, and it certainly keeps us within the loop of our comfort zone. We feel a brief sense of freedom, thinking we have made the choice that serves us, but no matter decisions we've got made that stems from worry will come back to hang-out us, it is only a matter of time.
As zen as it could sound, the best resolution-making process is still one that's based mostly on the present second, that feeds into our empowered state, and offers us a sense of freedom to understand that: hey! I'm always free to change my perspective about things, folks, situations and that I am allowed to evolve.
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